Intrigued by this post, which I don't completely agree with (the Champs-Élysées can be fun, especially right now when the Christmas market is up, and I love the 24-hour Maison d'Alsace late at night, a restaurant sponsored by Alsace, with its own boutique....). So I decided to post some of my own rules.
(The caption under this photo (left), in German, says, "This jacket belongs in every closet!")
Also, shorts are for sports (only) in Paris. Anyone else you see wearing them is a tourist. (Exception: at the moment short shorts are in style for girls and you see a lot of them over tights. Cute look!)
2. Talk softly.
3. Don't try to be French. It's okay to do things they won't do. While I was gone, my charming American tenants invited everyone in the building and most of the local commerçants to a cocktail party. The South American concierge came all dressed up, looking very pretty. Everyone is still talking about what a great party that was. No French person would have had the nerve to throw it.
4. Don't think the Latin Quarter and Saint-Germain are where the action is. Buy the Pariscope for a cheap look at what there is to do. The Canal Saint-Martin is a good place to start.
5. Don't wear a lot of makeup or dress up too much-- it's better to look casually chic.
6. Paris is an old people's city. For a wild time, go to London. Seriously.
7. In a nice restaurant or store, don't decide too quickly and don't ever be cowed by a waiter or salesperson. The more you care, the better they'll treat you.
8. This may be the most important rule of all. Don't ever walk up to anyone and just start asking a question. Always say hello or something else first. Bonjour Monsieur! Bonjour Madame! (The Monsieur/Madame is a class marker. Observe when people say it and then decide for yourself if you want to say it or not.) When you leave, say "Goodbye," not "Thank you."
9. Don't say Bon appetit.
10. Don't assume trains and planes will run as scheduled if you are traveling during a French holiday-- that's the favorite time for strikes.
I'll probably think of more tomorrow. Meanwhile, have a happy Thanksgiving!
Don't forget to avoid all the dog crap all over the place. That was really something I didn't expect.
I'd also suggest NOT eating in tourist-y areas. Go to where the locals are, not where other tourists are.
If you are walking under certain oak trees, be careful. I had a really nasty bout of oak leaf mite bites that lasted for months, with incessant itching. I looked diseased, it was awful and it made me hate Paris just a little bit more.
I'd suggest taking a day trip to Lyon as well and eating Voisin chocolates, and seeing what Europeans consider "the largest mall in Europe".
Posted by: FB @ FabulouslyBroke.com | 25 November 2010 at 21:03
why not say bon appetit?
Posted by: Fred | 25 November 2010 at 21:14
Are you sure about number 8? Anyone who comes to me on the steet and starts the conversation by "Bonjour Monsieur" has to be a beggar or someone who wants to sell me something. Wouldn't it be better to start by "Excusez-moi" and then ask your question? And after the reply not closing the conversation with "Merci" sounds very rude to me. Can you explain?
Posted by: Sebastien | 26 November 2010 at 10:55
Hi Fred! I've heard Americans say "Bon appetit," but I've never heard a Parisian say it. Maybe it's just the people I know. One French etiquette book says, "Bon appetit-- ne se dit pas." ["Bon appetit" is not said.] Who knows why.
I would say that if someone says it to you, it would be rude not to say it back. But I wouldn't say it otherwise.
@Sebastien, maybe you're right about Bonjour vs Excusez-moi-- I guess I mean that Americans tend to walk up to someone and immediately ask a question, without saying anything first. French people think that is rude. Then Americans tend to say Thanks and walk away, but in France people usually say Goodbye after Thanks, don't you think? Am I wrong about this?
Posted by: Sedulia | 26 November 2010 at 16:16
You can say bon appetit - it's just that it's a little bit low class. You wouldn't say it when trying to impress, but it's cute.
And i must completely disagree about being unable to party in Paris... there are some awesome places to go all night long, and people get crazy!
Posted by: Poulette | 26 November 2010 at 17:20
I think the American impulse not to waste time is what causes us to just blurt out a request. After many, many trips to France, I still have to remember to switch modes when I'm there, and always say hello or excuse me first.
Regarding #2, believe it or not, the quiet way people speak is one of my favorite things about France.
Posted by: chrissoup | 27 November 2010 at 04:55
Bonjour first for everyone! Seriously. If you do not, you may be asked to say it.
Posted by: Anne | 27 November 2010 at 07:16
I'm French (living in Germany for 4 years, but still French) and if I had to ask a question to someone on the street I would start with "Excusez-moi" and end with "Merci".
As Sébastien said, if a stranger starts with "Bonjour Monsieur/Madame", it sounds suspicious. You expect the person to sell you something or to tell you a never ending story.
The "Goodbye" at the end sounds strange to me.
Posted by: Jul | 27 November 2010 at 09:39
Thank you! I tend to end with "Merci" and always worry the other person will think it's rude. Good to know.
Posted by: Sedulia | 27 November 2010 at 12:21
For a wild time go to London? No chance. No chance!
I've just moved to London from Paris and am completely disappointed with the lack of night life here.
Posted by: Daley Brennan | 28 November 2010 at 16:02
Oh... okay! That makes me feel better actually... How about -- Berlin?
Posted by: Sedulia | 28 November 2010 at 18:12
En ce qui concerne 8 et 9: Dans le Sud-Ouest, on disait 'merciaurevoir'en quittant un magasin et 'bon aps !' avant de manger, mais bon, ça c'est le Sud-Ouest...
Posted by: friscolex | 29 November 2010 at 07:40
Yes, I lived in Grenoble for a year and anytime I ate with French friends they would always say bon appetit before a meal. They were all people with masters degrees but young-ish, so not sure what this means class-wise. Now I'm living in Paris and am not sure if they say this...maybe it's a regional thing? Also, I've noticed that the Monsieur/Madame thing isn't said very much in France anymore. But always, always say bonjour/bonsoir! Even if you're just walking into a shop. I've seen people get the stink-eye in small shops for walking in, even just to browse, without saying bonjour. And merci is a must too. Of course, in big department stores like Printemps this isn't an issue.
Posted by: Mademoiselle USA | 07 December 2010 at 00:12
I wish I could say you were wrong about the night life of London vs Paris. As a dancing fanatic, live music lover and general get out and enjoy the night kind-of woman that I am, I have been sorely disappointed by the Paris offerings.
Indeed, there are 'things going on' as is evident by the ads, posters etc. BUT once you get there, there is just over saturation of people. The French don't seem to understand that there just IS a point when you have to turn people away due to over-crowding. At times I felt like I was in a developing country in this regard.
Furthermore, the exact same concert being played in Paris versus, let's say Lyon will cost 2 or 3 times more. Now that is just not fair or reasonable.
My last comment on the night life of Paris vs Londoners, well you will actually SEE the visual manifestation of people actually having FUN in London. Laughter, smiling, complete strangers chatting it up, people dancing with abandon, colorful and outlandish appearances and the general sense of 'letting loose' is abundant in London.
We live in Paris, but I come alive in London. (From an American)
Posted by: nicole in paris | 13 December 2010 at 10:00
Not saying bon app must be a Parisian thing, everyone I know says it (Loire Valley). Sometimes at work people will even walk in on you finishing a meal and say 'bon fin d'appetit' which I think is a bit ridiculous, but hey!
Posted by: Gwan | 22 December 2010 at 22:14
For wild nightlife come to Brazil! You won't regret it!
Posted by: Cris | 03 December 2013 at 12:03